Way back at the first of September I wrote about my non-negotiables for dating a figure competitor/hot mess/me. At the time I was just settling into my (then) new town, open to the idea of dating and wow… was that ever a shocking experience.
First off, hello small town mentality! The fact that I’m 27 years old, single, never married, no kids. Wow. Yeah, I’m kind of a rare breed, which brings me to write V2.0 of dating a figure competitor. After a few… interesting tries at the dating scene I feel like there is so much to add to the original list, but here’s a good starting point.
- Quit asking why I’m single.
Not to be all into myself, but I get this a lot. Well I chose to focus on my career and myself before looking for extras in my life? I date the wrong men? What do you really want to hear?! The truth is yes, I did throw myself into work and developing ME as a person rather than a “we” because yes, I do tend to date the wrong people, I didn’t see myself settling down in Montreal, I had goals I wanted to accomplish, I fell zero rush to get married.
Sorry boys, that’s just how I work. Deal.
- Ambition. You’ve got to have it.
Sure, I enjoy the occasional lazy day on the couch watching tv and being a bum. Don’t we all need those days once in a while to recharge and get back to normal? But the key there is occasional. If you spend your days sleeping through 6 alarms, stay up way too late watching stupid tv you’re not even interested in and have no goals outside of “today I’m for real going to make it to work on time!” then we’ve got issues.
I feel like I’m a fairly ambitious person, between working long hours, being in the gym, dong cardio, running races (… on occassion), going out with friends, baking epic birthday cakes, to say I like to keep busy would be an understatement. Even if I was not going to compete again I’d be in the gym, I’d have goals, I’d do something ridiculous like taking up boxing or extreme power walking. I need to have goals and a passion for something… anything… in my life and so should you. Sure that means we may not see eachother 7 days a week, but trust me, you’d be sick of me seeing me that much so it’s a good thing I’ve got a life.
- Similar Lifestyles is a Must
I’m not talking about you needing to love (admittedly) bad instant coffee, go to the gym 6 days a week and eat eggs for 4 meals a day. Far from it. That’s me. Not you. But if you think staying up until 2 am and sleeping until 11 in the morning is going to work with me, you’re so wrong.
I’m a morning person. I do my best work before most people’s alarms go off. It’s a huge adjustment for me to be working nights. Yes, I consider finishing work at 9pm and not getting home until 10pm late. When I walk in the door I’m a zombie. There’s a good chance I’ve been on the go since 7:30 or 8 am and have stopped only to shove food in or grab a coffee.
While I get there is give and take, there are certain things in life I don’t feel like you should have to change. Maybe the right person may change my mind on this, but until then… Be a morning person, love to be outside, don’t depend on your car, eat some eggs and give me a call!
- You should belong to a gym or be on a sports team
That one kills me to put… but I’m realizing more and more how true it is.
Does this mean I want to date Joe Bodybuilder or Mike Cammalleri? No. You could be the worst player on your baseball team, run marathons, lift 5lb weights and I wouldn’t care because you’re doing it.
The gym, and being active in general is a huge part of me. I used to think it really didn’t matter, but if a guy doesn’t understand WHY I love it so much and have that same passion for some for of physical activity in his life then it makes things very hard. Missing a workout annoys me, and I want someone who understand why an aching body is a good thing, but an aching wrist will upset me.
PLEASE don’t tell me you live to go mudding. Driving a truck through the mud, getting stuck and getting drunk with me is not going to happen. I am not a princess but that just sounds like something I’d do once to say I did it then never go again. Maybe this is a New Brunswick thing, but yeah, no thanks. I’ll pass.
A guy who shocks me and actually wants to put on something other than flannel and skater shoes to go out to a nice dinner or comedy club. Well then you’ve got me. I have far too many expensive shoes sitting around begging to go out.
… Just not in the mud.
So there’s just a few more points… I’m sure if anyone still wants to date me after that I’ll be adding to the list… but until then….
Mike Cammalleri if you’re reading this I didn’t mean what I said about. Leave me your number. I promise to call. Seriously. Leave it. I’ll move back to Montreal.
Have you ever been mudding?! Please tell me I’m not alone in thinking this is… weird.