It’s really no big secret that 90% of people base their “diet” on a silly little number that the scale says.
And no, I’m not judging because I’ve obviously struggled with this. I’m only human after all.
The first four preps I did I lived for the scale. Some weeks more than others. If things were going down and looking good I’d be fine only hopping on once or twice a week just to check in with Joe.
…. But if it wasn’t looking good?
Ugh. My mood was determined by a silly little (probably wrong anyway) number.
When I joined Blueprint back at the end of November the scale part of prep was clear. Give a starting weight and a show day weight. The days, weeks, numbers in between mean nothing.
At first I didn’t even have a battery in my scale, and really didn’t care. Every now and then I’d pop the battery out of my food scale and check in and really, things were dropping, but I was SEEING it more so than any number ever told me. I could see how I was reacting to foods, watching my clothing get too big again, seeing the changes in the mirror.
And you know what? I felt a lot less stressed waking up on Saturday mornings knowing that I didn’t have to get on a scale…. and usually wouldn’t.
On the weekend I had to take the usual progress photos to send off. Just out of curiosity I pulled the scale out from way under the bed and hopped on. I have never given my weight on the blog and really don’t intend to start now, but I will say this. I was shocked.
Like really shocked. I knew I had been losing and my jeans were fitting again but yeah, shocked.
As I sat around later the number popped back in my head and I realized what that number was.
… Pretty much the exact number I saw one week out from all THREE of my first shows.
I’m still 13 weeks out and while I REALLY don’t feel anywhere near ready to step on a stage, it really reminded me just how far I’ve come in the last two years. While I’m not depleted out like I was in those photos, I still look lean, I have more shape to my arms (FINALLY) and yeah, I kind of like my legs.
(Yeah.. I’m pasty white. It’s a mid january Canadian thing people)
All four of those photos are within 2-3 lbs of each other. The miracle of all the photos/excels/emails saved on the old USB drive. I can’t stress enough to take pictures if you’re trying to track progress!
It’s been a long two years…. hello, just looking at the locations of those four photos shows three mega changes in my life in two years, but inside there’s been so many too. Mentally, physically, emotionally I feel so much stronger. The number on the scale and 100 cal packs aren’t ruling my life. I’m still pushing and striving to better myself, but it feels so healthy and different than it did years ago.
Looking back on the first photo from May 8th… I was an emotionally broken, but not beaten girl. I was so afraid of my new life and what was going to change. I honestly had no idea what was coming, but I wouldn’t change any of it for a second. Back then the scale was everything. It told me if I would have a good day… if my then boyfriend would question me that day… if I would enjoy my weekend.
Now? Not so much.
Yes, there are ups and downs and still a long way to go but I feel so much better say a big old F you to the scale hiding under my bed and just getting up everyday and doing my thing for me. Not for a number or anyone else. Just me and my goals.
Simple enough. Too bad I didn’t think of this mindset 10 years ago.
Do you weigh in? How do you feel about scales?