I just got my response back from my 15 week check in and well…. I rushed the photos, I had to work and was a little slow moving and well, I snapped, them, uploaded, took a quick look and emailed them off to Jody with my typical assessment.
I’m feeling better now (mentally) that I’m “dieting”, I feel less puffy and while I know I’m “big”, I feel leaner than before, but… thicker.
The email I got back was agreeing with me, although he used the term fuller, which is just a nicer way of saying thicker (clearly the guy know how to not make a woman feel like a tank) and that he was finishing up my new program and he would get it to me later on. I emailed back joking that I was glad he didn’t mention doubling my cardio until I get my new plan because well, the whole work thing meant I was training at night and if he would have said “more cardio” i would have done it, even thought I was pretty wiped.
I got a response fairly soon after that which left me really… confused? I legit didn’t know if I should laugh… or cry… or ask if the email was sent to the wrong person. So I did the only logical thing, teared up while fighting back a huge goofy grin. No shame here.
I admit I still see myself as the fat kid. I still struggle with how I look and how I “think” I should be dieting for my next show. I always assume it’s only a matter of time before I’m back on cardio and hungry. Even after atlantics and knowing how I prepped with around 20 minutes of cardio on average (the most being 32 minutes) and ate really well all the time I still just… can’t get my head around it.
So getting an email saying “welcome to the no cardio club” was kind of… a shock. Basically at this point cardio is maintenance. Yes I will be doing some, but no, it’s not going to be like before. it’s about health and all that blah blah blah, not fat loss. Kind of insane, but kind of exciting. The thought of being able to give even more in my workouts without thinking “ugh, need to save my energy for cardio” is really awesome at this point.
I decided to do what I do best.. compare. Photo 1 is 15 weeks from the July IDFA show in 2011, middle is 15 weeks from Atlantics and right is Saturday, 15 weeks from Provincials.
Um yeah… First off, I will never complain again this summer about how pasty white I think I am.
Secondly… in that photo from IDFA Ottawa I just look…. Hungry. Thin. Drawn out.
I was doing a lot of cardio. 40 minutes 6 days a week first thing in the morning, possibly at this point 10 minutes of HIIT post workout in the evenings too.
There was a lot of salads being eaten, still on gluten, dairy and not too sure WHAT I should be eating. As long as it fit in my macros I was good. My days often ended with me bloated, hungry, tired and worn out.
The middle photo I was eating fairly well, now gluten, dairy and sugar free. Following a set meal plan and Jody was doing my training. There was about 25 minutes of cardio going on. Nothing crazy.
The last photo…. Coming off about 12 weeks of building. Maintained my diet very very well, but admit to eating too many rice cakes with almond butter and having icecream once or twice. With my new meal plan to start prepping I am eating approx 250cals MORE than I was in the middle photo, doing half the cardio and still seeing results.
I know I’m not “there”. I know I have a long way to go, but this isn’t a quick fix plan, this is my journey. It’s about improving every single show, but more importantly every single day. Anyone who steps on stage deserves mad props for doing so, but for me it wasn’t about stepping on stage and walking off with a trophy, it’s been so much more than that and I’m just getting started. I know one day I’m going to get there, and for right now I’m really just enjoying watching the pieces fall into place and putting in the work.
… for today anyway. I’m sure in a week I’ll be panicking, but I’ll deal with that when the time comes.